Poor Zarqawi
He just found out that all 72 virgins have to remain virgins through all eternity.
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He just found out that all 72 virgins have to remain virgins through all eternity.
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Wrong. Truth is, via an unfortunate mistranslation from ancient Arabic, they find they get ONE 72 year-old virgin.
Comment by bird dog — June 9, 2006 @ 4:29 pm - June 9, 2006
No, That’s not it……he found out they were sheep.
Comment by Bill — June 9, 2006 @ 5:43 pm - June 9, 2006
Nah, they’re all really horny, they’re just all Helen Thomas clones.
Comment by curtis kreutzberg — June 9, 2006 @ 6:14 pm - June 9, 2006
You all have it wrong! This just came into my e-mail:
Zarqawi had just come to when a ghostly figure looking a lot like George Washington slugged him and knocked him out. When he regained consciousness he tried to sit up but was whacked over the head with a club by a ghostly figure looking a lot like Patrick Henry. Still again he came to only to face a ghostly figure looking a lot like Robert E. Lee, sabre in hand. Zarqawi took off running. screaming, “Oh my Allah, it’s not 72 virgins, it’s 72 Virginians!’
Comment by Trace Phelps — June 9, 2006 @ 6:33 pm - June 9, 2006
He was dissapionted when he found out it was 72 Norwegians!
Comment by sonicfrog — June 9, 2006 @ 10:12 pm - June 9, 2006
Or how ’bout this. The only way you can be a virgin in heaven is to die a virgin here on Earth. You remain a virgin on Earth if you’re hideously ulgy. So I’m afraid Zarqawi’s version of heaven may in fact be hell for the rest of us!
Comment by sonicfrog — June 9, 2006 @ 10:17 pm - June 9, 2006
Folks, courtesy of Iowahawk, the afterlife report from Zarqawi himself is: here
Comment by Calarato — June 10, 2006 @ 10:27 am - June 10, 2006
Perhaps the 72 virgins all look like Helen Thomas or Madeline Albright?
Comment by the friendly grizzly — June 11, 2006 @ 3:23 am - June 11, 2006