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A New Year’s Reflection

by

As many of you know, the Jewish New Year, Rosh Hashanah begins tonight at sundown, so as I write these words, some of our readers are already celebrating the holiday.

Every year, as the Jewish High Holy Days approach, I seek to engage in T’shuvah, the word literally means return (as if we return to the right path), where I examine my deeds in the past year and try to improve upon them for the year upcoming. To facilitate this process, I try to read S.Y. Agnon’s Days of Awe: A Treasury of Jewish Wisdom for Reflection, Repentance, and Renewal on the High Holy Days.

I have no clue how many times I’ve read this book since I first discovered it eighteen years ago. I find when I read it, it spurs me to reflection and helps me prepare for the Holy Days and the New Year.

This year, I pulled the book down from my shelves in the now-ending Hebrew month of Ellul, a month when, to paraphrase something I wrote two years ago at this time, we reflect, looking back on the previous year, considering our faults and resolve to improve ourselves. I didn’t get to it until just a few days ago.

I hesitated picking it up, fearing it would too much of a chore to get through, as I wanted to read the whole book over the Yamin Noraim, these Days of Awe, when we turn our thoughts to our Maker and our own improvement.

Once I started reading, however, it was not as much a chore as I initially feared. I found myself coming alive as I read, awakened to both the traditions of my people and the circumstances of my life, circumstances which helped explain (but not excuse) my own faults.  I realized (yet again) I was not the first to stray, not the first to take good things for granted.

I began to understand what it meant to be “humble and contrite.” Humble, that I am human and weak, not always able to live up to my duties and ideals. I’m not so proud to believe that I can always be perfect. Contrite, in that I take responsibility for my failures (even when I understand them) and seek to do better new year.

But, the real lesson I gleaned from this whole experience. While we may feel it is painful to consider our own imperfections, sometimes when we do, we discover the pain is lessened when we can see a path to improving upon them and find within ourselves the resolve to take the first step.

I’ve engaged in this process before. So, I ask another question: why do we hesitate sometimes to do those things which help us improve ourselves spiritually? And make us feel more engaged with our lives. And more alive.

May you, our readers, be inscribed and sealed for a Good Year.

Comments

  3. well gees dan. when you look at the “this” universe and realize that there are more than a few of them out there and then figure out that a billion years is a long time and that omnipotence includes the ability to get out daily emails and that whisperings in the ears of men is inefficient and that jesus is really tired of those 33 year gigs on planets with sentient beings and you have to blame it all on the jews: YOU GOTTA CONCLUDE, they are nuts

  7. Happy New Year!

    BTW, I’ve been a lurker on-and-off for years. I am a conservative Republican, whose Catholic religion means a lot to me.

    And I’d just like to say that I’m as proud as hell to share the same political philosophy as you guys.

    (What do YOU mean you guys) 😉

    Cheers,
    Victoria

  10. Maybe it would be a good thing for all of us to take this time and reflect on our own lives, the country and our leaders.
    I will now reflect twice a year. I think that is a start. Once does not seem to be working.

  11. Shana Tova Dan and all the readers here. It is a true blessing that our faith forces us to stop, separate ourselves from our daily lives for a while and really get introspective and spiritual.

    This rarely leads to a whole new outlook on life, but does make for a happier person.
    Of course America is top on my prayers this year, along with Israel. My true prayer isn’t for our leaders – rather that the American people find it in them to keep this amazing country running despite the best efforts of those in charge to derail this wonderful country.

    Either way, enjoy an apple dipped in honey – may that be a symbol of very sweet things to come.

  12. Dan, interesting post and Happy New Year to you and the readers.

    We Catholics do the “reflection-repentance-reform” thing each month when we attend Confession. It’d be kind of nice to limit that emotionally and spiritually eviscerating event to an annual one. I think the Islamic faith is a once-a-year reflection religion too.

    But then, we Catholics have waaay more guilt than the average Jew and more to atone for each month that if we waited a year, the debt would require marathon confessional sessions and there wouldn’t even be enough priests in Heaven to take care of it all –if they could assist.

    An unexamined life is clearly not worth living.

    As a parent, I like that the same guy who said “An unexamined life is not worth living” also said “”Children today are tyrants. They contradict their parents, gobble their food, and tyrannize their teachers.” What was that? 400 BC?

    Some things never change, eh?

  13. L’shana tova!

    Dan, you are the one shining light I can always depend upon. Even today, on Day 1 of Rosh Hashanah, I spent so much time at Temple reflecting on the good in this world which was not easy after the stock meltdown of yesterday. But, I will survive this a lot easier than my ancestors whose very existence was in doubt from day to day. Thank you for your insight and most positive and encourging blog. A healthy and most prosperous new year to you and all your loved ones.

  15. Happy New Year to you, Dan.

    You and Bruce do a great job keeping this blog up and running with interesting posts and a place where (mostly) interesting people get to discuss the issues of the day.

  16. Shana Tova! Next year in Jerusalem!

    #14 – Leah, try being a kid whose parents are Russian and Greek Orthodox respectively. We get the Jewish guilt with KGB tactics. (Example: “I can’t believe how insensitive you are. Now go to your room or I’ll kill you!”)

    And that was just my mother talking. Ah, the memories of youth! 😉

    Regards,
    Peter H.