I want to begin this post by commending the various gay organizations spearheading “Meet in the Middle” event in Fresno yesterday. They’re taking a step in the right direction by gathering in a more Republican region of the state, understanding that they need “explain who we are to the heartland,” as Orange County gay activist Linda May put it.
I believe, Prop 8 will be overturned, if those organized in favor of a new ballot initiative doing just that, work to change people’s minds by making the case for gay marriage (instead of attacking supporters of the institution’s traditional definition). To that end, they need develop a strategy to reach Republicans, given that Republicans, like Fresno residents, voted overwhelmingly in favor of Prop 8.
I did not attend “Meet in the Middle” (even as I had considered going as it might provide fodder for blog posts) for a great variety of reasons, chief, among them, that while approximately one in every four self-identified gay voter votes Republican, organizers included no Republicans on the event agenda, as just as their confrères (and soeurs) invited no Republicans to speak at the Decision Day Rally, as they had no Republicans at a Town hall on gay marriage at LA’s Gay and Lesbian Center, as they included no Republicans in the officials program of the “Equality Summit.”
See the pattern? In conferences on gay marriage, the organizing groups regularly exclude gay Republicans.
To overturn Prop 8, they’d do well to include those who know how to talk to a group which voted overwhelmingly in favor of the ballot initiative.
Perhaps gay Republicans should start boycotting such confabs until the organizers acknowledge our presence in the community. If we were an approved minority which threatened such action, they would bend over backwards to accommodate us, even holding seminars exploring their own internalized bias against political minorities in the gay community.
More on this anon, much more.
LOL. “meet in the middle!”
Why is it liberals cant name anything honestly? Everything they say or do is cloaked in lies meant to convince you they are doing the very opposite of what they are really doing.
One expects, from their name, a group seeking some sort of middle ground. But of course its nothing of the sort, its a group that has no intention of budging an inch from their position.
Not that there’s anything wrong with forming a group to push a political agenda, but its important to note how consistently dishonest they are about everything.
Because people have said I don’t see much of the gay community, I went to a gay bar last night. It was the same, exact gay bar I left 20 years ago. Everyone was a walking stereotype. There was a huge man in a sparkly blue dress. Another guy was talking about his trip back from Leather Days in Chicago. Apparently, there’s a lot of public sexual activity there. My point is, the Prop 8 protesters are saying that people just don’t know what gay people are really like. Yes, they do–they are the people I saw at the bar. They are amoral, bitter people (the guy on the stool next to me sat with his back to me the whole time, not speaking) who think that dressing up as a female is somehow shocking. People tell me I’m missing out on the diversity of the gay community–every contact I’ve ever had has been exactly the same. The conversation was about sex, sex, sex and drugs. Oh, and victimhood.
The bartender was cute. In case he’s reading this.
I didn’t go. I was working. Fresno is a fairly conservative area. I wonder how the attendance will compare to today’s pro-8 rally.
I think that would be an awesome idea. The more Republicans, especially gay Republicans, that stay away from gay marriage events, the more likely they will pass.
First intelligent thing you’ve suggested in years.
Yet again, you miss out on an opportunity.
This is at least another time you’ve found some self-justification for not going to an event, proclaiming later it would have, at the very least, provided a good blog entry.
It gets tiresome to come and see now repeated “posts” which are nothing more than your venting. This shows more on your egoism and writing ability than it does the exclusion of Republicans on Prop 8 events. Grow some balls, get in the car, take some pictures, ask some questions. When you can’t be bothered, I don’t know that many of your criticisms of the press for being lazy come with much weight.
Tim, when was the last time you went to a pro-life rally?
Ash, not sure what your point was, maybe you can clarify. I’ll do the same.
The author of the post states, “I did not attend “Meet in the Middle” (even as I had considered going as it might provide fodder for blog posts)” What do you think would have contributed more to the argument or this blog in particular? The author going to the rally, talking to their organizers, providing his viewpoint, and reporting back to us? Or, as he chose, to find some reason not to go, giving his opposition no voice, and just venting on us? Personally, I find it disengenuous to pretend to contribute or move anything forward when that’s the extent of the effort he’ll make.
It reminds me of people who always gripe about gay pride parades. All the closet conservative gays who whine and bitch about how “cliche” and “sexualized” the parades are. If more people who were just normal folk marched in them instead of bitching, maybe that wouldn’t be the reputation they had. It’s very easy to sit and bitch or type out a blog post while you’re comfort level never reaches beyond your cup of coffee. It’s quite another to leave your house, make your voice heard, and interact or stand up to make sure you’re changing the image of gays.
GayPatriotWest,
Thanks for quoting me, but one clarification is in order. Republicans were invited to speak at the Orange County Decision Day rally and all declined. I think they were afraid of what their constituents would think. I expect gay Republicans will be more welcome at these kinds of events when we see a track record of gay and straight ally Republicans demanding equal rights from their Republican elected officials. The bridge has to be built from both sides of the river.
Linda
Tim, that you note that I have repeated certain notions on this blog is a sign that you do indeed read my posts. And I appreciate that. But, if you read my posts, you should also know that I have attended two of the four events listed in this post. You would know that I offered a largely favorable view of the crowd at the Decision Day rally, that I singled out for praise what one woman said from the podium. As I praised some of the discussion at the Equality Forum.
Had you considered the posts on these events before you wrote, you would see that I do far more than whine. The evidence is there. Just do a few searches. I’m tired of providing links for my critics because they never seen to do any good. They’ll just continue to rank as if the links did not exist. So, Tim, please show me you’re different.
At one where I could speak, I did speak. At the other where I couldn’t, I talked to the one person I knew who was on the stage and asked her to pass only this concern to the organizers.
This was not the first time I asked her to do so.
I have e-mailed several of the organizers of the Prop 8 campaign, including Lori Jean asking them to meet with me. E-mails have gone unanswered.
So, you tell me a whine. . . . I thought whining was when you bemoan your lot, but don’t offer a solution. I have. And I’ve praised the gay groups when praise is due, even in this post. I trust you read the first paragraph.
As to making my voice heard, that’s the purpose of this post–and the others where I repeat the them.
And why should I go to an event where I know my voice wouldn’t be heard? As it wouldn’t have been in Fresno.
I’m developing some constructive ideas on how to overturn 8. I will post them here on this blog, not as whining, but as suggestions for action. I post them hear, but at least they’ll get read. I have no clue if Jean of Geoff Kors ever even read my e-mails. Like I said, they did not offer me the courtesy of a response, even to refuse my request.
One more point, about the snarky tone of your first comment, Tim. Yeah, it would have provided good material for a blog post, to trek half-way across a very large state to attend a rally where I’d hear much of the same stuff I heard Tuesday, but it would also cost me a day to make the journey. And blogging about politics is not my life–as my recent entries should show.
So, you’re telling me I should go out of my way to rally to get information for a blog post–for which I’m not paid–and break my promise to a friend to help out with her yard sale and deprive myself of the enjoyment of going to the movies that evening with another friend. Maybe your life is all politics, but mine is not.
Go find my post linked in the post above about why I didn’t attend the town hall at the Gay and Lesbian Center. I have better things to do with my time than listen to the same tired slogans from the same tired old spokesmen. The Speakers’ List for Fresno featured many of the same people whom I had heard Tuesday night in West Hollywood. And I’ll bet good money they said the same things they said then.
Linda–I apologize for the delay in the posting of your comment, but our spam filter can be mighty capricious, especially with new commenters. It held yours until I rescued it.
I’m delighted you invited Republicans to attend your event in Orange County, but please don’t make assumptions about why they refused to attend. They may have had conflicts. Were gay Republicans invited to Orange County rally? Did you invite a representative of Log Cabin?
Are you aware of the work Republicans Against 8 did last fall? Many gay Republicans are already making efforts to change hearts and minds. While I agree that the bridge has to be built from both sides, I’m not sure I agree that analogy works in these events. Gay Republicans weren’t organizing these events. Left-leaning groups were. I cited four events in my post (I’m sure our readers could come up with many, many, many more), all organized by such groups.
Perhaps, gay Republicans should have been more proactive in soliciting such invitations. But, shouldn’t the groups be aware of Republicans within our midst or do they just choose to ignore us?
This is a long-standing problem. And should the organizers of the efforts to exclude Prop 8 fail to include Republicans, as they did last fall, then they will fail as they did this past fall. For, if next year’s elections follow traditional patterns, GOP turnout out will be far higher next fall and Democratic turnout will decline.
The organizers of Decision Day in Orange County began with no political agenda other than reacting to the Ca. Supreme Court’s decision. Individuals from various Democratic and progressive organizations quickly came on board. The planning group decided to ask one or two elected officials to speak. Names of elected officials came up who had track records of concern about our rights. When it became apparent all those named were Democrats, I took it upon myself to make sure Republicans had the opportunity to be involved. This is Orange County after all.
I meet Log Cabin Republicans at their booth at Long Beach Pride and told them about the opportunity for elected official involvement. I called OC Republican headquarters and they gave the phone to a man in the office who was involved with Log Cabin Republicans. He offered names of their members but none were elected officials. He mentioned a few names of elected officials. I emailed them requesting they call me if they would like to speak. The court decision had not come in so the exact date was uncertain, therefore conflicts were not an excuse. I heard back from one elected official who said she would not attend; no explanation given.
Linda, delighted that you made an effort to include Republicans. Seems the composition of your rally was similar to that in LA, with a lot of elected officials.
Yet, the LA rally also included community leaders and activists. I had dashed out this post to make a broader point–to address gay confabs in general –and not just this weekend’s events.
If the Orange County speakers’ roster was limited to elected officials, then my point is moot, at least as per your rally unless there are gay Republican elected officials in the OC (but I’m not aware of any).
I appreciate that you made the effort to reach out to the GOP. I wish your counterparts in LA County (and the State) did the same. Please encourage your colleagues across the state to follow your example. Seems like you got the same response from GOP groups that I got from gay groups in LA–a non-response.
On the one hand, I hate to see all territory ceded to my opponents, but on the other, it’s tough to convince me of the merits of making myself and my positions known at an event that will merely invite my being shouted down (or worse) — especially as an opponent of same-sex marriage. Declining to attend such events is likely due to the futility of arguing with people wielding megaphones rather than worrying about how attending might be interpreted by a segment of constituents and the negligible benefits of attempting to appeal to the fleeting to non-existent reason of a numerically negligible segment of the population. Am I stereotyping? Yes, based upon observed behavior.
I’m in favor of a small group setting, each attendee given an opportunity to speak without interruption and a respectful, civil question/answer period. Remove mob dynamics and enforce reasonable rules equally and hearts (if not minds) can be changed and boogeymen can be evaporated.
When they say “Meet in the Middle”, they mean a liberal coffee klatsch in the middle of the state and that’s it.
Linda,
Thank you for your posting, Hopefully both you and Dan can find common ground and help the GBLT find their way from a one party plantation.
Ignatius, I understand what you mean. I’ve stopped going to munches and events, not just because my ex-wife is at every one of them, but because the majority are so hostile to people of faith, and I feel the need to defend myself.
Of course, since I’m the outsider self defense is seen as instigating…