GayPatriot

The Internet home for American gay conservatives.

Powered by Genesis

BREAKING NEWS: CIA DISCOVERS SECRET SLEEPER CELL IN USA

January 6, 2010 by GayPatriot

I have an exclusive story here folks!  My sources within the government have informed me that thanks to the intrepid hard work and intelligence gathered earlier this week in Costa Rica, a deadly and widespread terror sleeper cell has been disrupted.

It appears that a band of Joan Rivers impersonators had been deployed to conduct a campaign of terror by disrupting sleep patterns throughout the United States.  The Joan Rivers look-alikes talk with voices that interfere with the normal wavelengths of human perception.  The cackling and screeching being uttered across the nation would have resulted in mass insomnia from coast to coast.

Thank God our CIA, TSA and worldwide intelligence officials were on the look out for these dangerous suspects and picked up their leader before she had a chance to deploy this evil plot.  White House Spokesperson Robert Gibbs was quick to point out today that the Joan Rivers Sleeper Cell was a direct result of GITMO being used as a recruiting tool with drag queens.

-Bruce (GayPatriot)

Filed Under: Annoying Celebrities, Obama Incompetence, Obama Watch, War On Terror

Comments

  1. PatriotMom says

    January 6, 2010 at 12:42 pm - January 6, 2010

    I loved her line that if she was choosing an alias did they think it would be Rosenberg

  2. Draybee says

    January 6, 2010 at 1:59 pm - January 6, 2010

    Don’t worry. I’m sure it isn’t the first time she’s been pulled back.

  3. MFS says

    January 6, 2010 at 2:01 pm - January 6, 2010

    Mean.

    Funny. But, mean.

    Best wishes,
    -MFS

  4. Jimmy says

    January 6, 2010 at 2:43 pm - January 6, 2010

    It’s probably a good idea to question her. With all of the implants, I’m sure she’s highly explosive!

  5. ThatGayConservative says

    January 6, 2010 at 6:19 pm - January 6, 2010

    I’m betting she no longer resembles her passport photo.

  6. Leah says

    January 6, 2010 at 7:54 pm - January 6, 2010

    TGC, lol! Not only does she not match her photo, I’m not sure she resembles anything human. She is getting into Michael Jackson territory, her face is falling apart.

  7. StraightAussie says

    January 8, 2010 at 7:29 pm - January 8, 2010

    This is a wonderful comment over the silliness of holding this woman back from getting her flight. They owe her an apology.

Categories

Archives