A New Era in the US Military
Most of this summer I didn’t get to post too much because I had been quite busy preparing for another deployment. It’s from that forward location that I’m able to post for you today, this historic moment.
And it’s appropriate, I think.
I joined the military after Bill Clinton had signed “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell”, so I never lived in a military where simply being homosexual was grounds for discharge. I lived my entire military career, up until today, as a closeted gay man in uniform. I followed the rules, kept it to myself (save a few other gay servicemembers and a handful over the years of closely trusted colleagues), and never ran afoul of the rules. I did my job, and I did it well.
I continue to do so, and I am not alone.
So it’s fitting, then, that I should spend this day—when gay “rights” groups back home will celebrate some sort of liberation of mine—simply doing what I’ve been doing for about 20 years: my job. While politically-minded activists will be slapping themselves on the back and praising the newly-granted privileges I and my fellow gay servicemembers now enjoy, we and tens of thousands of other deployed troops will spend today doing what we do: Our job.
While I appreciate your gladness on my behalf, please do take a moment today and keep in mind that there were some of us who were serving under DADT without regard for it.
While I am grateful that the era of homosexuality being the military’s business has ended, I am grateful more so for those who, like me, joined the military knowing the score and choosing this rewarding life anyway.
While I welcome those young men and women into the ranks of our military who heretofore had waited the policy out, I am much more proud of those who didn’t require their own terms be met in order to answer the call to serve in the first place.
It’s already Tuesday, September 20th, 2011 where I am, so I’m one of the first gay servicemembers in history who can legally come out. I won’t of course, but from now on, I’ll belay the gender-nonspecific pronouns and no longer demure when the stories turn to family. I just Skyped with my boyfriend back in the States and we talked about this whole thing. He’s proud of me, but I’m also proud of him (as all my colleagues are of their families back home). I’m in love with him, we’re quite a pair. And if I wanted to, I could take a picture of us into my office today and put it right on my desk.
-Nick (ColoradoPatriot, from A Forward Operating Location)
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Well said. Stay safe… and thanks.
Comment by SoCalRobert — September 19, 2011 @ 9:21 pm - September 19, 2011
Thank you for your service. And thank your boyfriend for me as well – family, though not in harms ways, experiences just as much hardship during deployment as the service member.
Comment by Dan Irving — September 19, 2011 @ 9:21 pm - September 19, 2011
Amen, brother! I’m a reservist with 16+ years of service and I couldn’t agree more. We do our duty as we always have – with integrity and devotion to duty. I can say that honestly and sincerely because my identity is not solely dependent on my being gay. I joined because I wanted to serve. Even after the new, big openess, I’m still the same. An American who serves … who also happens to be gay, conservative, and a lover of fine beer.
Thanks.
Comment by Jack G. — September 19, 2011 @ 9:40 pm - September 19, 2011
Jack, thanks for so eloquently making my point. You are a true patriot and it’s been my honor to serve alongside people such as yourself over my career. I agree with everything you say in your post. Well, except that I’m a vodka man. Best to you and thank you for your service, my brother.
Comment by ColoradoPatriot — September 19, 2011 @ 9:47 pm - September 19, 2011
Congratulations guys! And thank you for your service.
I served in the navy, long before DADT. Most of us knew who was gay and who was straight, and it didn’t matter as long as everyone did his job and supported others. Of course, it was a time when gays COULD be expelled from the service, but my experience was that it didn’t happen often.
Anyway, I’m glad you can serve now without having to be secretive.
Comment by mcswan — September 19, 2011 @ 10:33 pm - September 19, 2011
I was in the Navy in the `80′s at the height of the “gay witch hunts” as the MSM called them.
I don’t remember any of the people we knew (or suspected) were gay to be persecuted.
As long as they did their jobs and left us alone (like the women looked at it, too probably) we were fine.
I’d be happy to buy you a beer if you’re ever around San Antonio.
Comment by Kurt P — September 19, 2011 @ 10:45 pm - September 19, 2011
Nick, thanks for your service!
Comment by ILoveCapitalism — September 20, 2011 @ 2:01 am - September 20, 2011
Thanks for your post, first sane post Ive seen on the subject today. And as always, thanks for your service. Please stay safe.
Comment by AmericanElephant — September 20, 2011 @ 4:54 am - September 20, 2011
Thank you, Nick. You’ve ‘accommodated’ and sacrificed on levels many cannot imagine. The stamina required to do your job and maintain a separate ‘reality’ is remarkable.
I’m the first in five generations of my family to not serve, as I failed the medical exam in 1983 for a complicated diagnosis of my eyes.
I realized when I offered to enlist that being a silently-serving homosexual was something I ‘could deal with’… it never once occurred to me not to enlist for that reason. The eye diagnosis and subsequent rejection (F9, I think it’s called) floored me. I was in a daze all that week.
I graduated in the top 2% of my hs class and had not considered college outside the Navy’s offers of full scholarship and its plan to bring me up in Nuclear Medicine. But I managed and after a long marriage and now a stable, fulfilling partnership, I have been on the civilian path God destined for me; and I know this because:
Medical science developed a permanent cure/fix for my eyes in 2007, literally just a month after my 43rd birthday.
Congratulations and sincere thanks for your service and sacrifices, Nick. I hope that while you will not be making outward changes necessarily… that inside you have a new strength of purpose, peace and personal security.
Comment by rodney — September 20, 2011 @ 6:34 am - September 20, 2011
I don’t entirely agree with you, Nick, but besides being glad that DADT is now gone I’m also happy it’s no longer an issue for debate. Regardless, thanks for your service and I hope you and the boyfriend have many happy years together.
Comment by JohnAGJ — September 20, 2011 @ 8:35 am - September 20, 2011
As I was reading your post, Nick, I realized something was missing. There was no reference anywhere to America being safer now that you can put a picture of you and your boyfriend “right on my desk”. That omission was odd because when you and I had a minidebate last year about DADT you insisted that repeal was about national security and had nothing to do with social issues or any kind of social engineering of the military. I didn’t believe you then and the last sentence of your post shows that I was right not to.
When he spoke at Liberty University last week, presidential candidate Rick Perry said that some kind of value system guides individuals and society, and the value system that guides him is Christian. That ruffled the usual liberal feathers but Rick Perry is right. There’s no such thing as a values vacuum. Some kind of value system, rooted in some kind of belief system, political or religious, will guide and inform people’s decisions, including the policy decisions of politicians. And that’s what repeal of DADT was all about.
There is a war to eradicate Christian values from our culture, NOT to make our culture values free, but to replace Christian values with secular progressive–as Bill O’Reilly calls them–values. Repeal of DADT was a battle in that war, and it won’t stop with mere repeal. What happens when a gay serviceman wants his “husband” to live in base housing? The military doesn’t recognize gay marriage, right? The SPs will have a perfect “Roe v Wade” moment and they can then file a lawsuit that could result in gay marriage becoming legal in all 50 states by supreme judicial decree, just like with abortion. That would be another triumph over traditional, Bible-based values. And the same thing could happen with anything else pertaining to gay “liberation”, e.g. gay adoption. That’s what this “new era” in the military is really all about and that’s why you didn’t mention anything about a safer America in your post, Nick. Open homosexuality in the military is not about making America safer, it’s about making America less traditional. Period.
Now you all can pick up your rocks and start throwing them at me.
Comment by Seane-Anna — September 20, 2011 @ 8:45 am - September 20, 2011
Sort of appropriate that DADT ended on a Tuesday.
Comment by V the K — September 20, 2011 @ 8:57 am - September 20, 2011
“’m also happy it’s no longer an issue for debate.”
JohnAGJ, if the vote for repeal had gone the other way, would you have graciously accepted that DADT was “no longer an issue for debate” and then gone on with your life? I doubt it. This blog often criticizes the Left for never being open to debate, yet I never cease to be amazed at how quickly many “conservative” gays (and their straight allies) here want debate to stop when they get their way. That’s one of the rules I’ve learned here: when traditionalists lose, the debate is over and they’d better accept it; when gays lose the fight is still on and all who continue to oppose them are diabolical, theocratic, fascist bigots. Saul Alinsky would be proud.
Comment by Seane-Anna — September 20, 2011 @ 8:58 am - September 20, 2011
Nick, so glad you have this opportunity to serve openly. Like you, I served my time all in post-signature period for DADT. I heartily second your thoughts on the call to serve.
Stay safe. Best wishes to you and your S.O.
Comment by Neptune — September 20, 2011 @ 9:03 am - September 20, 2011
Seane-Anna by saying that DADT is no longer “no longer an issue for debate” I meant that it’s not something which really concerns me anymore because repeal has gone through and I’m confident that implementation while not perfect will be smooth overall. However, you are of course free to “debate” the issue to your heart’s content and lobby for reinstatement of the ban if you wish. Yet until I see your efforts bearing some fruit I won’t be taking them seriously so you’ll be having a “debate” over this by yourself. It’s a “done deal” as far as I’m concerned but feel free to prove me wrong.
Comment by JohnAGJ — September 20, 2011 @ 9:14 am - September 20, 2011
Thanks for your service Nick (my little brother just reupped himself).
Take care of yourself over there!
As to DADT, I’m still hopeful that natural deselection will help with any issues that come up.
Comment by The_Livewire — September 20, 2011 @ 9:27 am - September 20, 2011
What Robert said.
Comment by Sonicfrog — September 20, 2011 @ 9:43 am - September 20, 2011
Seane-Anna:
While I’ll admit my gladness for how this policy change benefits me offers fuel to the burning straw-man argument you’ve repeatedly waged against me in your continuing attempt to distract from mature conversation in favor of falsely attacking my motivations, I’ll note that in all this time, over all the times you and I have debated this issue, you’ve still never actually rebutted any of the arguments I have made for repeal of this policy on National Security grounds.
For what it’s worth, though, Yes, I will indeed benefit from this policy change. And yes, personally I am grateful for that.
Likewise, I was also promoted last month. In order to do so, my commander and I had to put together a package of performance reports and recommendation forms to go before a board offering proof that the military would benefit from my being moved into a higher grade. So to follow your logic, should I take no pleasure in the higher pay and privileges that accompany my new rank, lest I be some sort of hypocrite? Should I be gratified for no other reason than now I get to serve my nation more consequentially now that I’m in this new grade?
Comment by ColoradoPatriot — September 20, 2011 @ 10:14 am - September 20, 2011
Thank you for your committed service and your strength of character to be an individual of merit, regardless of either the opportunity or the burden of being gay.
Comment by Heliotrope — September 20, 2011 @ 10:18 am - September 20, 2011
Somewhere in Heaven Maj. General Baron Friedrich Wilhelm August Heinrich Ferdinand von Steuben, Drillmaster, Chief of Staff and Inspector General of the Continental Army, author of “Regulations for the Order and Discipline of the Troops of the United States” is smiling.
Comment by Ted B. (Charging Rhino) — September 20, 2011 @ 11:09 am - September 20, 2011
Nick, hope you join me for a beer if you ever get to Houston!
Regards,
Peter H.
Comment by Peter Hughes — September 20, 2011 @ 11:11 am - September 20, 2011
West Point’s honor code says not to lie. That doesn’t mean just technically not lying, it means a commitment to telling the truth. The gender-nonspecific pronouns that you can now dispense with were contrary to the spirit of integrity and truthfulness embodied in the military’s honor codes.
You speak of how ‘gay “rights” groups back home will celebrate some sort of liberation of mine’. Speaking just for myself, I celebrate that you are no longer told on the one hand to be fully direct and forthright and on the other hand to finesse and hide parts of your life. And I celebrate that the military will no longer discharge valuable servicemembers as it had been doing under DADT.
Comment by Tom1729 — September 20, 2011 @ 11:55 am - September 20, 2011
My father was an officer in the Air Force for 20 years and my twin brother was in the Navy for over 26 years and would still be in if leukemia hadn’t taken his life. I admire all who serve and sacrifice so much for our country and I want to thank you and your boyfriend personally for being true patriots. Stay safe!
Comment by Lisa M. — September 20, 2011 @ 12:01 pm - September 20, 2011
God bless you and be safe. By all means put up that photo1
Comment by Leah — September 20, 2011 @ 12:08 pm - September 20, 2011
Nick, thank you for your service to our country, you are a true gay patriot!!!!! To ALL our military men and women, stay safe, and God Bless America!
Comment by Chad — September 20, 2011 @ 3:41 pm - September 20, 2011
Wonderful post, fellow GayPatriot!!!
Be well and keep your head on a swivel!
Comment by Eric Olsen — September 20, 2011 @ 4:43 pm - September 20, 2011
To all my fellow vets, thank you for your service. I joined in 1966 when being gay could get a DD. When I was in basic there were several gay guys in the billets waiting for the their discharge. In the meantime, they were practically isolated. They couldn´t shower with the rest of the platoon nor have any conversation. Maybe I had buyers remorse when I went to the CO and told him I was gay. He laughed and asked who was I trying to kid. He said he knew a homosexual when he saw one and that I wasn´t (not the sterotype). He accused me of becoming a malingerer and told me to get my ass back out in the field. Once I rotated back to the states I found so many gay guys including a couple who were in my BTU and AIT. I was enjoying my gay life so much,especially living off post in downtown Baltimore with gay bars all around and meeting GI´s from other posts. that I had given thought to re-upping and going for the greenie beanie. But I didn´t want to delay returning to civilian life to work on the goals which I had made for myself.
Comment by Roberto — September 20, 2011 @ 7:07 pm - September 20, 2011
I really screwed the pooch on that one. Reposted for clarity.
Seane-Anna:
Then state / ask:
Lets say that everything you state does come to pass. You may not like the breaking of “traditions”, but nothing you list makes America less safe either. It just changes things.
Comment by Sonicfrog — September 20, 2011 @ 7:21 pm - September 20, 2011
Seane-Anna,
“Saul Alinsky would be proud.”
So would, Theodor Adorno.
Comment by Richard Bell — September 20, 2011 @ 8:10 pm - September 20, 2011
I oppose forcing chaplains to perform “gay marriage” just as I oppose “gay marriage” in my state. As I see it, repeal of DADT was the easy part.
Comment by Richard Bell — September 20, 2011 @ 8:18 pm - September 20, 2011
I hope that activists take the real lesson of the repeal campaign to heart, namely that you can actually accomplish things when you stand up to the donkeys, rather than taking the scraps that they throw you.
Of course, they’d prefer the “lesson” of how stomping around childishly and chaining yourself to the White House fence won the day.
Comment by NYAlly — September 20, 2011 @ 11:28 pm - September 20, 2011
Off the subject of all these comments, but, it is striking that Rush Limbaugh let this day pass without comment…maybe tomorrow? I only say that because I’m a fan and a listener and I really don’t think he’s a homophobe.
Comment by Eddie — September 21, 2011 @ 12:10 am - September 21, 2011
Just to be the pill in all this jam, what exactly did any of you do in favor of DADT repeal? Don’t you think some expression of gratitude to us liberal lefties is in order for the majority of work to pass this in the first place?
And best of luck Nick. I appreciate your service and am very happy that with the DADT repeal it’s one less thing occupying the minds of gay soldiers to allow them to stay safer and focus more on their fellow soldiers and the mission.
Comment by Countervail — September 21, 2011 @ 1:11 am - September 21, 2011
Just to be the pill in all this jam, what exactly did any of you do in favor of DADT repeal? Don’t you think some expression of gratitude to us liberal lefties is in order for the majority of work to pass this in the first place?
Which do you think was a better argument, Counterfail; the service of gays like Nick, or the actions of leftists like yourself who made excuses for Clinton pushing DADT in the first place, threw screaming public tantrums and fence-chaining incidents demonstrating how mentally unfit you were to be anywhere near a weapon, and who supported and endorsed blindly your Obama Party’s calling troops, gay or straight, “uninvited and unwelcome intruders” in their own country?
DADT was repealed in SPITE of you. And indeed, you and your fellow perverts who want special treatment are going to be the people who get it reimposed.
The first real test will be when a gay person does something wrong and gets kicked out of the armed forces — and dollars to doughnuts says that Counterfail and the rest of the screaming left will be there insisting that it is “homophobia” and that gay and lesbian people should not be held accountable.
Oh, that’s right; it’s already happened, and that’s exactly what Counterfail and his idiot leftie friends are doing.
So how do you reconcile that, Counterfail? You and your fellow gay lefties sit here and be all nice about Nick’s service, and then you go have a screaming fit defending little gay shits like Bradley Manning who are doing everything in their power to get Nick, other troops, and our allies killed.
Answer: You’re a hypocrite.
Comment by North Dallas Thirty — September 21, 2011 @ 1:30 am - September 21, 2011
If lefties like Counterfail had their way, there wouldn’t be a military for gays to serve in.
Comment by V the K — September 21, 2011 @ 12:17 pm - September 21, 2011
First, Kudos to You Nick, and many thanks to you and all those serve.
Now to ABC’s
Airman Randy Phillips Comes Out On YouTube To His Dad
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9Hnrp73StWA
AGJ posted it yesterday . . .
What a amazing clip.
Comment by rusty — September 21, 2011 @ 6:19 pm - September 21, 2011
Nick, congratulations on your promotion. And I do feel safer that good people can stay in the military and continue to serve if they want to and are able to.
Comment by Pat — September 22, 2011 @ 6:50 am - September 22, 2011
Oh oh, Nick.
You should not have posted this, you would get the ire of social conservatives like Seane Anne and would boo your service to our country.
Comment by JS — September 23, 2011 @ 12:52 pm - September 23, 2011
I want to acknowledge Dennis, Louis, Alfred, Fergie Joe,Mike,Randy Ricky, my fellow gay buddies who had the balls to serve during the Viet Nam era, when we could have been DD´d when there was no DADT.
Comment by Roberto — September 23, 2011 @ 2:54 pm - September 23, 2011
I do not know much about you this Open Gay Solider however I salute any American who choose to risk his life for our nation out of feelings of patriotically and nationalism because he consider that our nation civilization, America it is unique and we should defend our Classical Liberal Western values and prevent that our Western civilization be overturn either by Islamic theocratic model , Communist model, Latin American big government , tyrant worship model
Regarding , the religious values of political figures critical of homosexuals serving openly in the military. I respect their views and the freedom to dissent because freedom of speech and freedom of conscience is an old fashion American value . I remember the old fashion saying,
Actions speak better than words,
It is contradictory that people who claims to support Christians values
which should includes . You shall not bear false testimony and that according to Jesus, I paraphrase, I do not like a lying tongue
Someone who claims to be in favor of National Security and Jobs Creation for Americans, how come support measures that have make Texas a paradise for illegal aliens( does he forget how many enemies sleepers could be slipping in) what about the truth that most of the job creation in Texas during the last 4 years has benefits mostly illegal and new legal immigrants not Americans citizens. And what such religious individual has done regarding to Multiculturalism the Trojan horse which is undermining Western civilization in America and turning Europe into Euroarabia. Did he stop it ? reverse it ? or embracing it to win votes? and lets remember that truth set us free. Many immigrants are social conservative but being social conservative and be assimilated loyal Americans it is not mutually inclusive and it is time that many social conservatives stop avoiding to face the issue ? That their favorite ‘new voting block”Hispanic, Hindus etc are they really assimilated spite of their social conservatism? Why so many social conservatives second generation American of Latin American ancestry , are members of La Raza, Mecha, or the nation of Aztlan ? Which one is better for America A Patriotic Open Homosexual Soldier ? or social conservative member , very religious but unpatriotic , supporter of Mecha, La Raza , Aztlan supporter and ‘latinos are not the only voting block in such boat but many ethnic groups due to the taboo issue absent from the Presidential debates , Multiculturalism?
Comment by american — September 23, 2011 @ 9:00 pm - September 23, 2011
I’d be inclined to thank you for your service and wish you well, but as you couldn’t resist a disrespectful slap at the very people who helped end this policy, a few additional things should be said. First, when discussing people who are fighting for gay equality, the words you need to use are “thank you”. You don’t need to sneer at them and you don’t need to put the word “rights” in scare quotes. There really is such a thing as the Equal Protection Clause and to be treated equally under law is a right, not a “right”. As for gay leaders and activists, I don’t agree with everything they say and I dislike many of them. But if I were in your situation, I might have the maturity and grace to acknowledge that they worked on my behalf, even sacrificing legislative priorities such as ENDA, in order to get DADT repeal done.
Second, it is unseemly of you to minimize the burden of the DADT statute and regs on gay servicemembers. You claim that you were able to “follow the rules” for 20 years. But you didn’t follow the rules. You violated the rules when you disclosed your homosexuality to other servicemembers. There was no exception for disclosure to a “few” people, other gays or trusted colleagues. In fact, you violated the rules a second time when you failed to turn in those other gay servicemembers. And each of those people should have, under the DADT regulations, turned you in. The only reason that you are now able to boast that you did your job for 20 years is because all of those people violated regulations, as did you.
Finally, while it is (now) entirely your decision as to whether to come out, I don’t know why you say “of course” you won’t. Why “of course”? Is it so beyond the pale that you might put up the photo of the person you love?
Comment by David — September 23, 2011 @ 9:12 pm - September 23, 2011