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Why must opposition to gay marriage always be “hate”?

Since I was driving to Denver yesterday, I was unable to participate in the “Kiss-in” at the Hollywood Chick-fil-A.  Had I been in town, I may well have joined in, having fun by finding a fetching fellow to kiss in front of the franchise, then walking into the restaurant and buying him a nice chicken meal, while ordering a nice cup of their most refreshing lemonade for myself.

Given some of the photos (via Instapundit) I saw from the “Kiss-In”, it seems that most protesters were more interested in expressing themselves than in presenting a positive image of same-sex affection. Yeah, a three-person kiss and signs like “Eat More Carpet” will go a long way to changing social conservative attitudes toward gays.

Now, these folks were surely having fun.  One thing that’s great about America is that they are free to express so flamboyantly their opposition to the views of the chicken chain’s president.

But, just as such flamboyant displays of disagreement likely will make it more challenging to change minds, so too is labeling opposition to gay marriage as “hate” little likely to foster dialogue.  According to the Los Angeles Times, the Rev. Sarah Halverson of Fairview Community Church did just that, saying she

 . . . respects [Chick-fil-A President Dan] Cathy’s right to free speech, she said, but also exercised her own right to speak out against what she considers hate speech.

“We have the right to stand in disagreement with another’s speech,” she said.

At a Chick-fil-A in Torrance where vandals painted the words “Tastes Like Hate” on the side of the restaurant Thursday night, the “National Same-Sex Kiss Day” was off to a slow start.

She’s does have the right to stand in disagreement.  That said, we should also consider whether the way we stand causes those with whom we disagree to reconsider their views.  Calling those views “hate speech” is not likely to effect such reconsideration.  If anything, it may cause them to double down in disagreement.

NB:  Tweaked the conclusion to improve its flow.

FROM THE COMMENTS:  Just Me finds it to be a shame that some utilize the confrontational tactics, “because I think gays would get much further by engaging in legitimate debate than the in your face, deliberately provocative displays that don’t pay any respect to the other opinion or with any attempt to find common ground.”



  1. Heh. I didn’t realize how ridiculous that thing is before, but that is true. I would be very surprised if even the most homophobic person refused to use a computer because Alan Turing contributed to its development. But basically what the people who wrote that are assuming is that people who are opposed to gay marriage wouldn’t continue to support companies that are even remotely supportive of “gay rights” or whatever.

    That’s been my favourite line of attack as well. Given the governments of OPEC members actively kill gays and lesbians, how can people who want to shut up Chick-fil-a in good conscience drive cars? Or use anything with plastic in it?

    Comment by The_Livewire — August 6, 2012 @ 7:48 am - August 6, 2012

  2. Livewire,

    When the major weapons in the activist gay arsenal involve unleashing hissy fits and glitter bombs, do they get in the face of “other-cheek-turners” or the people who will grab your scrawny neck and execute them in public after drawing a crowd of rabid onlookers and justification fans?

    Richard R seems to limit his focus on those he has least reason to fear. He is still at recess in the fifth grade where he goes over a pushes the second graders around.

    Comment by heliotrope — August 6, 2012 @ 10:42 am - August 6, 2012

  3. Dave P. @50:

    If I may dovetail onto your point, the same phenomenon is happening in my church in “social justice” Catholic parishes where the Mass is for entertainment and Father Razzle Dazzle is “in town all week–2 shows on Sunday!” are dwindling. There is a movement afoot to support non “Novus Ordo” masses and return to the Tridentine Latin Mass. Yeah, that one: where the priest faces the altar, you KNEEL at an altar rail to receive communion and the mass is about a SACRIFICE, not a potluck with a lousy menu.

    People know fake crap when they see it, and are not fooled.

    Comment by Bastiat Fan — August 6, 2012 @ 11:53 am - August 6, 2012

  4. Heliotrope, you are spot-on.

    I have received no answer whatsoever from “Equality” Illinois, HRC, and The Civil Rights Agenda to my challenge to them to hold a “kiss-in” here — despite its owners’ long and documented history of teaching against gays and lesbians — and the fact that all of the profits and revenues of said restaurant go back into the Nation of Islam to spread Farrakhan’s teachings.

    I even challenged Richard Rush on it — and no response.


    1) Abusive bigots like Richard Rush and his fellow LGBT “activists” would rather face off against this than black-suited men in bow ties with a history and practice of beating the crap out of anyone who disagrees with them.

    2) Given the latter above, they are acutely aware of whom their precious Obama Party will side with when violence occurs — as in, the police won’t come, no arrests will be made, and Rahm and their precious Obamamessiah will be on TV lecturing them for being “provocative”.

    So you are right. They are bullies, and like most bullies, they are cowards. And more and more people are starting to realize that every minute.

    Comment by North Dallas Thirty — August 6, 2012 @ 12:03 pm - August 6, 2012

  5. Building off your last point ND30 – The moment when Obama truly lost me happened during the Don’t Ask Don’t Tell repeal debacle. The “activists” conveniently forget how the Obamaniacs were chiding Daniel Choi and SMLDN for being too “proactive” and uppity over their increased protestations over Obama and Reid’s stalling tactics (remember Reid tacking on the Dream Act when it looked like there would be some Republicans supporting repeal DADT). Meanwhile, they were inviting the HRC lackeys to cocktail receptions as a sop for them staying submissive and obedient sycophants.

    Obama was only prompted to finally repeal DADT when he finally realized that the activists weren’t going to shut up and wer actually holding him accountable for his false promises.

    I severed the last thread of connection to BHO at that point when it was clear he would throw his loyal gays to the wolves when it suited him. By the time he “evolved” to giving the wet kiss to deh gays and proclaimed support for SSM, I wanted to splash bleach on myself and take a scalding shower in disgust.

    Comment by PopArt — August 6, 2012 @ 2:51 pm - August 6, 2012

  6. Dave P, the growth of the Mormon church could have something to do with the rather liberal reproductive choices.

    Comment by Cinesnatch — August 6, 2012 @ 9:45 pm - August 6, 2012

  7. Cine- or maybe they offer enough spiritual fare to attract new members and keep old ones, while the “tolerant” Eppy and Angy churches aren’t even persuasive enough to keep their doors from closing; it matters what they offer- and the “tolerant” churches don’t offer any communion that can’t be recieved from, say, a subscription to the New York Times or a half hour listening to NPR.
    BTW- isn’t “them types breed like flies” kind of a bigoted statement for you to make?

    Comment by DaveP. — August 7, 2012 @ 4:10 am - August 7, 2012

  8. @Dave,

    Part of the reason I call myself a Lutheran Heretic is that I seperate with the church on a number of policy decisions, including its stand on Israel. So I have to agree with your point.

    Comment by The_Livewire — August 7, 2012 @ 7:44 am - August 7, 2012

  9. Dave P, perhaps it is. But when someone talks about growth in the Mormon religion, the first thing that comes to mind is their liberal reproductive habits, just like Catholics in the mid-20th century. I grew up in a town where 6-7 kids was a pretty standard Mormon family. Sometimes more, sometimes less. Popular examples like mitt Romney, jon huntsman, orrin hatch, and Patricia Heaton support the idea Mormons tend not to subscribe to zero sum population. The most popular young actors who come from Mormon families, like Jon header, Katharine heigl, amy Adams, and Eliza dushko, all come from families of four or larger. But then you have exceptions like wilford brimley who, to my knowledge, didn’t have any children.

    This isn’t a judgment (otherwise I would write off people like huntsman), but an observation. Perhaps it is a bigoted statement. But I don’t hear anyone refuting the theory that the growth of the Mormon religion is in due large part to their liberal reproductive choices. If you have any links of the such, please share. I would be interested.

    Comment by Cinesnatch — August 7, 2012 @ 11:33 am - August 7, 2012

  10. […] for traditional marriage does not, however, necessarily mean hatred of gay […]

    Pingback by GayPatriot » Bloodshed and Invective in the District of Columbia — August 16, 2012 @ 4:20 am - August 16, 2012

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